Archive for January, 2007

#33 Home Despairs

  I follow a simple rule for safe living; never enter a home where I have performed any maintenance work on the plumbing or electrical systems. When it comes to home repairs I am the very model of unskilled labor. This isn’t an inherited trait. Given any domestic mechanical problem, my father can work miracles. [...]

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#32 Enjoy This Essay!

  The illuminated sign on the front of the soda dispenser screamed out ENJOY! in letters large and bright enough to be read by nearsighted people in locked closets a half mile away. I wondered why the soda company felt compelled to tell me how to interact with their product. Were they afraid I wasn’t [...]

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#31 iPod, Do You?

  Today at the store, I saw a small set of speakers and thought, “My iPod would probably really like those.” So I bought them and found out I was right. My iPod really did like them. Readers who are in the mental health field are probably thumbing through their diagnostic manuals trying to put [...]

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#30 Business Writing

From what I can see there are two ways to become insanely wealthy as a writer; pen a best-selling novel or publish a business advice book. These days most best-selling novels deal with globe-and-time-spanning conspiracies, or dueling magicians, or failing marriages, or dueling marriages and failing conspiracies, or failing magicians and dueling conspiracies. I don’t [...]

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