The illuminated sign on the front of the soda dispenser screamed out ENJOY! in letters large and bright enough to be read by nearsighted people in locked closets a half mile away. I wondered why the soda company felt compelled to tell me how to interact with their product. Were they afraid I wasn’t [...]

  Today at the store, I saw a small set of speakers and thought, “My iPod would probably really like those.” So I bought them and found out I was right. My iPod really did like them. Readers who are in the mental health field are probably thumbing through their diagnostic manuals trying to put [...]

From what I can see there are two ways to become insanely wealthy as a writer; pen a best-selling novel or publish a business advice book. These days most best-selling novels deal with globe-and-time-spanning conspiracies, or dueling magicians, or failing marriages, or dueling marriages and failing conspiracies, or failing magicians and dueling conspiracies. I don’t [...]

  My son was involved in an accident last week. Yes, he was driving. No, he doesn’t have a license. Yes, he was on a cell phone at the time. No, he’s not in trouble. The other driver was on a cell phone, too. The only damage was a couple of broken eggs. They were [...]