Short Cummings Audio presents Happily Domesticated » communication http://www.shortcummingsaudio.com Life -- In Funny, Six-Minute Slices Sat, 24 Jul 2010 07:15:23 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0 Every episode features a new funny story. Think Erma Bombeck with a PC, Dave Barry with recording software or Garrison Keillor with a microphone... Oh, wait. Strike that last one. If you enjoy clean humor and a slightly skewed perspective on family life (I have two teenage sons...of course my life is skewed-up) please give this show a listen. Kevin Cummings clean Kevin Cummings KevinLeeC@yahoo.com KevinLeeC@yahoo.com (Kevin Cummings) 2006-2010 Life -- In Funny, Six-Minute Slices humor, humor essay, funny, funny story, shortcomings Short Cummings Audio presents Happily Domesticated » communication http://assets.farpointmedia.net/shortc/images/shortc.albumart.144.jpg http://www.shortcummingsaudio.com #007 — Verbal Warnings http://www.shortcummingsaudio.com/2010/05/007-verbal-warnings/ http://www.shortcummingsaudio.com/2010/05/007-verbal-warnings/#comments Sat, 29 May 2010 07:15:50 +0000 Kevin http://www.shortcummingsaudio.com/?p=1355 Sponsor: Hold your meetings online for just $49 a month Try GoToMeeting free.

The highway department has taken to using large electronic signs to warn drivers about hazardous or difficult road conditions.  For example, you might see a sign flashing the message: “Road Construction Ahead – Delays Possible”.  This means, of course, that you will be delayed.  And, if you haven’t packed any food, you might want to draw straws to see which of the people in the car is going to be a tasty lunch for the survivors.

A sign reading “Detour Ahead” means check your fuel level because you’re about to go seventy-eight miles out of your way on roads which last saw use during the Taft administration.

“Heavy Traffic Expected — Consider Alternate Route” means that everyone in North America has chosen the same road as you.  Be nice to the cars around you.  You’ll be traveling beside them for the next few decades. (Full Text)

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Like this excerpt? Want the whole story? Listen to the audio version by clicking the ‘Play’ button at the top of this post. If you’d rather read it, you can find the full text at http://wp.me/pjV28-A
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]]> http://www.shortcummingsaudio.com/2010/05/007-verbal-warnings/feed/ 0 humor, funny, comedy, story, computer, words, communication Life -- In Funny, Six-Minute, Slices Sponsor: Hold your meetings online for just $49 a month Try GoToMeeting free. (http://altfarm.mediaplex.com/ad/ck/6549-98960-16567-1) The highway department has taken to using large electronic signs to warn drivers about hazardous or difficult road conditions.  For example, you might see a sign flashing the message: “Road Construction Ahead – Delays Possible”.  This means, of course, that you will be delayed.  And, if you haven't packed any food, you might want to draw straws to see which of the people in the car is going to be a tasty lunch for the survivors. A sign reading "Detour Ahead" means check your fuel level because you're about to go seventy-eight miles out of your way on roads which last saw use during the Taft administration. "Heavy Traffic Expected -- Consider Alternate Route" means that everyone in North America has chosen the same road as you.  Be nice to the cars around you.  You'll be traveling beside them for the next few decades. (Full Text (http://wp.me/pjV28-A)) =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Like this excerpt? Want the whole story? Listen to the audio version by clicking the ‘Play’ button at the top of this post. If you’d rather read it, you can find the full text at http://wp.me/pjV28-A (http://wp.me/pjV28-A) -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Kevin Cummings clean 8:11 #146 — Effective Marital Communications http://www.shortcummingsaudio.com/2009/03/146-effective-marital-communications/ http://www.shortcummingsaudio.com/2009/03/146-effective-marital-communications/#comments Sat, 28 Mar 2009 07:15:23 +0000 Kevin http://www.shortcummingsaudio.com/?p=925

After twenty-three years of marriage, my wife and I have lost the ability to finish our own sentences. Unfortunately, we’ve never gained the power of reliably finishing each other’s sentences. A typical conversation over the dinner table has more gaps than a six-year-old’s smile.

My wife starts strong with something like, “Did you remember to stop and pick-up the … ummm ….” She winds down and her face goes blank until she looks like Paris Hilton on Final Jeopardy. It’s clear that her brain has vapor-locked, so I do my best to step-in and help out.

“You mean the … “ My mouth sends an urgent request to my brain for the rest of the sentence. My ever-helpful brain can’t find the information, but does return the mental equivalent of a 404 web error. Page not found. Try using a different address or contact the webmaster.

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Like this excerpt? Want the whole story? Listen to the audio version by clicking the ‘Play’ button at the top of this post. If you’d rather read it, you can find the full text at http://myfavoriteshortcomings.wordpress.com/2009/03/21/effective-mari…communicationseffective-marital-communications/

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Notes:

  • Thanks to Susie, host of the How to Grow Your Geek parenting podcast for the bumper.  You can find her at:
    http://www.howtogrowyourgeek.net/
  • Thanks, also to Twitter follower DaddySir4 for his kind words.

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]]> http://www.shortcummingsaudio.com/2009/03/146-effective-marital-communications/feed/ 0 communication,marriage,relationships,words - After twenty-three years of marriage, my wife and I have lost the ability to finish our own sentences. Unfortunately, we’ve never gained the power of reliably finishing each other’s sentences. A typical conversation over the dinner table has more ga... After twenty-three years of marriage, my wife and I have lost the ability to finish our own sentences. Unfortunately, we’ve never gained the power of reliably finishing each other’s sentences. A typical conversation over the dinner table has more gaps than a six-year-old’s smile. My wife starts strong with something like, “Did you remember to stop and pick-up the ... ummm ....” She winds down and her face goes blank until she looks like Paris Hilton on Final Jeopardy. It’s clear that her brain has vapor-locked, so I do my best to step-in and help out. “You mean the ... “ My mouth sends an urgent request to my brain for the rest of the sentence. My ever-helpful brain can’t find the information, but does return the mental equivalent of a 404 web error. Page not found. Try using a different address or contact the webmaster. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Like this excerpt? Want the whole story? Listen to the audio version by clicking the ‘Play’ button at the top of this post. If you’d rather read it, you can find the full text at http://myfavoriteshortcomings.wordpress.com/2009/03/21/effective-mari…communicationseffective-marital-communications/ (http://myfavoriteshortcomings.wordpress.com/2009/03/21/effective-mari…communicationseffective-marital-communications/) -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Notes: * Thanks to Susie, host of the How to Grow Your Geek parenting podcast for the bumper.  You can find her at: http://www.howtogrowyourgeek.net/ (http://www.howtogrowyourgeek.net/) * Thanks, also to Twitter follower DaddySir4 for his kind words. Kevin Cummings clean